Tuesday, June 19, 2007

12 to Remember: Buffalo @ Carolina 10/4/06

So here we are, starting the season all over again as MSG has decided to show us Buffalo’s season opener against the Carolina Hurricanes. Even though I didn’t get to see this game, I was walking on air for a few days afterward knowing that we had rained on Carolina’s banner-raising parade. The wounds from the previous post-season were still, uh, quite fresh. Anyway, on to the show!

The broadcast begins by showing us this save from the regular season. Since the Sabres lost that game to the Bruins, it’s not a part of the 12 to Remember, but I’m glad they found a way to include it. It was truly one of the highlights of the year. Then, after a quick montage of celebrations by players and fans alike, Kevin Sylvester comes on and tells us something or other about what we’re about to watch. I’m not entirely sure what he’s saying here, because I am, as always, too focused on the marvels that are his perma-dimples. One day I’m going to figure out the secret behind those things.

First Period
20:00 Apparently one of the things I failed to listen to Kevin say was that this game was aired on Versus and thus it is not being called by Rick Jeanneret. I refuse to believe that MSG couldn’t manage to edit RJ’s radio broadcast over the Versus feed, and I plan on writing them a strongly worded letter.
19:45 15 seconds into the season, and already someone’s lost their stick. New record, I think.
16:36 Briere gets called for holding the stick. Oh no, do we really have to revisit the special teams? Can’t we just call this “Sabres 12 to Remember: Special Teams, that means not you”?
15:59 Derek Roy wipes out with no one near him. Clearly he’s trying to replace his reputation as a diver with the slightly less nefarious reputation of “that guy who falls down a lot.”
14:56 Doc reminds us that the Sabres were in the top of the league with both the PP and the PK last season. That salt, she stings in my wounds, Doc. Still, that was a nice kill, there.
12:01 Cole hits the post on a fast break, and the fans are halfway though their celebration before they realize he didn’t score. Suckers.
10:51 After a stoppage of play we get an awkward cut to eight seconds later (seriously, MSG, you couldn’t spare eight seconds?) But no matter because Pominville SCORES! A nice deflection off a Kalinin wrister from the blue line. It’s the Sabres' second shot of the night, and if I remember correctly, the first one was an easy pass-like shot from Roy just inside the blue line.
7:48 After Ward makes a stop on Drury, we learn he earns $3.00 towards some unspecified charity with every save he makes. Considering so far in the season he’s 2-for-3, I worry for the people depending on that money. I hope it’s not for something important like providing food or shelter.
-- Ed references Spacek as a potential difference-maker added in the off-season, and mentions a “bone-crunching” hit earlier in the game. My dad says: “Was that his one hit of the season?” Oh, it’s such fun watching these games with 20/20 hindsight!
5:18 Boooo, Eric Staal scores. Miller figures “What better time to start the tally of ‘ones I want back’ than in the season opener?”
4:53 Pentalty called. Versus should go to the box for using the camera farthest away from the play as possible on the replay, so we can’t see what the actual infraction was. Instead, it’s Gaustad for something-or-other.
3:20 Doc sums up two careers with one sentence: “Afinogenov with a crafty move, but the shot went wide, meanwhile Roy is knocked down.”
2:32 Spacek shows his true colors by fanning on a shot and giving Brind’Amour a short-handed chance. Luckily, Soupy is awesome, and Rod the Bod only gets a weak shot.
1:27 Numminen, with a strong defensive play, negates a possible breakaway by Cole coming out of the box.
0:00 Okay, Carolina, what gives? Stormy the Pig has to be the least relevant mascot in NHL history.

Second Period
18:13 Novotny is called for cross checking, which we don’t get to see because Doc and Ed are too busy talking about how Tallinder is going to the box for something else. I hate Versus.
17:32 Hecht makes a great shorthanded play, and almost scores even with a defender’s stick in his skates. Way to go, Yo-Yo!
17:27 This time we actually get to see why Gaustad went to the box. What we don’t see is what makes a Carolina player go with him. Versus sucks.
15:21 Max does his best figure skating and draws a penalty.
15:00 A beautiful play by Pominville and Vanek forces Ward to get lucky.
13:57 Hecht clearly retroactively hates being chosen as my favorite player, as he performs quite literally the worst turnover I’ve ever seen. And after the playoffs I consider myself somewhat of an expert.
12:57 Versus is incapable of showing us why anyone is going to the box! Commodore is called for “holding,” but from what we’re shown, it should be for “engaging in sissy-girl pushing with Hecht.”
10:06 I have given up hope of ever seeing any of these infractions. Kotalik gets called for something no one sees, because MSG insists on telling us that this game happened on October 4th with the aid of an unnecessarily HUGE banner on the bottom of the screen.
9:30 I love Hecht again! He and Drury put on some great short-handed pressure, but Jochen hits the post.
9:14 There’s another penalty called, but of course we’ll never see it. After Ed listens to the “unsportsmanlike conduct” call, he says “wow, on Adam Mair,” like this is somehow surprising.
8:24 After some nice 5-on-3 killing, Tallinder gets called for trying to take Staal’s face off. I can’t really blame him, there.
7:19 Cole scores. It probably would have happened much sooner if the ‘Canes could manage to hit the net.
5:31 Someone gets sandwiched between Numminen and Miller and flies face-first into the blue paint. Nice.
4:28 TIE GAME! All five Sabres touched the puck on the play, as Drury gets credit for deflecting it in with his pants. Dear Darcy Regier: Chris Drury is a god. The man can score goals with his PANTS!
3:26 Now, this is the Buffalo power play I remember: Carolina takes over possession and Briere takes a penalty.
2:14 A Carolina player, whose name I’m too lazy to look up, is stupid enough to trip over Numminen’s skate while coasting backwards, and the fans start whining for a call. Sorry, guys, but there’s no minor for “causing hilarity.”
1:11 Briere downright undresses an anonymous Carolina d-man and then sends the puck to the net. Too bad Roy figures goalie interference is as good as a goal, and doesn’t get his stick on it.
0:37 Doc takes Roy in the box as a cue to talk about the league-wide crack-down on diving. A gorgeous Soupy spin-o-rama goes unnoticed.

Third Period
After commercial, Kevin informs us we are now jumping to 8:44 left in the third. Sigh, MSG giveth, and MSG taketh away.
8:18 Goose gets a stick to the face, and a shiner he will have for literally the rest of the season. I always wondered where that came from.
7:09 Yet another awesome defensive move by Old Man Teppo as he negates a 2-1.
5:33 Justin Williams uses his mic’d up opportunity to sound like a petulant child as he yells at his players and the refs alike.
4:59 Ward grabs a puck Pominville whiffed royally on, and Doc calls it a good stop. Huh? I miss Rick.
3:30 Briere gets a great screen shot away but Ward snags it with his glove.
2:41 Whitney, in turn, gets a great turn-around shot, but Miller couldn’t look any cooler as it bounces off his chest and he grabs it out of midair.
1:05 Hecht grabs an Afinogenov pass from in between two Hurricanes with a neat stick move, pivots it into the crease and shoots it… directly at Ward’s logo. Oh well, Yo-Yo, you know you don’t have to score to earn my love!
0:08 Buffalo gets some amazing pressure in the last minute, so naturally they almost lose the game in the last ten seconds.

Overtime
5:00 There are some dramatic, pre-overtime close-ups of the players, and I take this moment to notice how everyone’s chinstraps are buckled. The general consensus: not very well. I feel only Hank Tallinder would survive the patent-pending Chris Neil Helmet Test.
4:11 Great breakway chance by Vanek. Even Ward knows he didn’t deserve that Conn Smythe as he looks behind him into the net like he’s sure it went in. Somehow it didn’t.
3:51 Numminen feels he’s mastered defense already, and decides to give offense a try as he skates a large circle around the net. No one can get it from him, but his shot goes wide.
2:06 Novotny picks himself up from a fall, only to whiff on the puck. Hope you’re having fun in Washington, Jiri!
0:13 Numminen makes a glorious pass to Briere in front of the net, which Danny deflects masterfully. Cam Ward looks like he has no idea where he is, but somehow manages to save it.

Shootout
Versus makes up for showing the loathed Hurricane Ice Girls by giving me an interview with my favorite backup: Marty Biron! Marty is in rare form tonight as he says he doesn’t want to give up “the tricks of the trade” about shootout goaltending, but it’s all about “getting your gap good,” and so Ryan must “get good gap.” Oh, Marty. You’re like that adorable little turtle from Finding Nemo. I don’t know what you’re saying, but you sure are cute!
1st Shot: Whitney shoots wide of the net.
2nd Shot: Briere dekes Ward out of his pads and roofs it over his head. He makes it look like adding insult to injury.
3rd Shot: Miller kicks away Staal’s attempt at a similar move.
4th Shot: A bench shot shows Gaustad is strangely angry when Vanek gets stoned by Ward on the stick side. For Thomas’ sake, I hope they don’t room together.
5th Shot: Well, that was anti-climactic. Miller makes an easy save when Cole shoots it right at his chest. But he also gets to make his first of ten consecutive celebrations, as the Sabres win this one 3-2 in a shootout.

The ever-be-dimpled Kevin reminds us that this first game was a sign of things to come, as the Sabres would go on to sweep the regular season series against the Hurricanes, and win ten games in shootouts. Coming up next week: The home opener against the Montreal Canadiens. I know how that one turns out, but I'm not going to ruin it for anyone.

Well, I have to say this was an interesting experiment. It took more viewings and a lot more time than I thought it would, but it was definitely fun. If there are no objections to these diaries appearing late (I'll take the silence and chirping crickets as a yes), I'm going to continue writing them. Until next time!

4 comments:

Schnookie said...

Dude, Gambler, this was AWESOME! I can't wait to read the next 11 of them!!! (And we don't do ours "live" on IPB; we post during intermissions. Because I'm anal about formatting and grammar. Your clamoring hordes of fans will be patient for you -- at least, that's how they seem to be for our game diaries...)

Gambler said...

Thanks so much for the compliment, Schnookie, I'm glad you enjoyed it! (And by "live" I really meant "within 12 hours of the game itself," which is something I'll probably never be able to accomplish.)

Meg said...

Yay...I thought your game diary was great, Gambler! Consider me part of the clamoring horde and keep writing them. :)

Heather B. said...

Gambler, great job. I don't think I'd have the patience to do this so I'm glad you are. It really was kind of interesting to listen to the commentators with 20/20 hindsight. We responded to all the same things you did - the special teams and Spacek particularly.

Way to go, Yo-Yo!

See! isn't it fun?! It just rolls off the tongue.

I feel only Hank Tallinder would survive the patent-pending Chris Neil Helmet Test.

That's because I wrote to Hank and told him that if he didn't fasten up that lid I'd climb down on the ice and do it for him! Let's keep that head looking handsome!